Below you will find some common conflicts between God's will and human wisdom. The topics are listed in alphabetical order in teal. Under each topic is an example of a common ideology that falls under that topic. Following the ideology are a few possible comments you can make when you want to say something but are also concerned about being sensitive and preserving the friendship. These are not the only response but examples of ways to keep the conversation going while encouraging the person to clarify what they are saying, think more deeply about the subject, and open up an avenue for you to gently offer your concern or alternative viewpoint. 

The responses below are best used with the questions posed in our resource Conversations, which can be found following the link below.

A scripture reference at the end of each section informs us of God's will regarding the particular ideology.

Next to "Possible Response," you will sometime notice a star or set of stars. You will find the resource we referenced for the possible response at the end of this page.

Possible Responses:*

• I don't believe since someone is born a certain way, that means it is good. I think people are accountable to the same standards of behavior regardless of their genetic makeup (e.g., murder, embezzlement, etc.). What do you think?

• Could you help me understand how feelings or genetic makeup determine right from wrong (e.g., pedophilia, adultery, etc.)?

Many behaviors may seem personal, natural, and right to some, but they are still morally wrong acts.

Consider:

• We may have strong desires, but our conduct is not mandatory.

Romans 1:26-27; 1 Corinthians 6:9-10, 19-20; 1 Timothy 1:9-10; Deuteronomy 22:5

Possible Response:*

• I think some things are objectively wrong whether adults consent to them or not (e.g., a beaten spouse who agrees she deserved it). What do you think?

Romans 1:26-27; 1 Corinthians 6:9-10; 1 Timothy 1:9-10; Deuteronomy 22:5

A Possible Response**

• I agree with you in most cases. Everyone should have equal opportunities (e.g., for a job, promotion, etc.). But I don't believe just because something isn't equal, it always means it's bad/wrong. What do you mean when you say everyone needs to be treated equally?

For example, a worker, who does just enough not to get fired, shouldn't be paid the same as someone going above and beyond to complete their work.

The inequality of Christ's death on the cross paid the price of our sins and justified us before God.

1 Corinthians 3:12-15; Luke 12:48

A Possible Response:*

• I'm confused. I've had many times my emotions have fed me lies. Wouldn't this reasoning insinuate no one could encourage a depressed person they have value? 

I would not ignore the impact perception can have on a person. But neither would I claim that perception can change the outside world's reality.

Genesis 1:27; Psalm 139:13-17; 1 John 3:2

Possible response: 

• While it is true that God does not make mistakes, it is still a fallen world filled with sin and vice due to the disobedience of humanity. We still have many ideas and desires that go against his will.  



James 1:13-15; 2 Chronicles 19:7

Possible Response: 

• It is true that we as Christians are commanded to not judge hypocritically and to remember we are all flawed. However, that does not mean we must turn a blind eye to those who are going down the wrong path. If you see someone you care about making decisions that are harmful to them, wouldn’t you want to help them make better choices?  

Is it judging to tell someone engaging in self-harm this is not an appropriate response to whatever they are feeling?  

• We can come alongside people with care and compassion to help guide them on the right path. We must remember not to be judgmental in our approach to helping them. 

Matthew 7:1-5; Matthew 28:19-20 

Possible Response:*

• Am I correct in saying you want your morality imposed through legislation (e.g., LGBTQ+ rights, hate crimes should be illegal, etc.)?

• Wouldn't you say all laws legislate morality? They impose a moral code.

Consider:

• Many people believe that whatever is legal is moral, and legalizing something encourages such behavior.

Matthew 14:3-4; Matthew 28:19-20; 2 Corinthians 5:20

Possible Response:  

• Would you consider the conversation loving if the discussion was over the potential of the individual being harmed or their actions being illegal?   

• While I agree that minor decisions don’t typically affect those around you, our choices can often be more consequential than we realize. Asking someone to affirm another person’s identity is making a request about how people use language, which can often lead to the use of improper terminology. Furthermore, we aren’t just atomized individuals; we’re members of communities and society. By making society at large accept people’s self-identities, it leads to a slippery slope of the elimination of certain groups’ private spaces. 

Matthew 28:19-20; Habbakkuk1:13

Possible response:  

• It sounds like this is also a big deal to you. I’m I correct in thinking you are passionate about LGBTQ+ rights? 

Maybe this is an important topic to a lot of people. Could you explain to me why it’s important for people to affirm the LGBTQ+ agenda?  

• I care about these issues because I care for the well-being of those around me. Do you think it is good to care for the well-being of others? 

I want people to make good choices so they can live happier and healthier lives. I also don’t want to see harmful ideologies pushed onto other people. These ideas can be especially harmful to kids because they’re easily impressionable and frequently change their minds about what they want.  

Matthew 28:19-20; Romans 1:26-27; Hebrews 13:4; 1 Thessalonians 3:4-5

A Possible Response**

• I like the concept, but I struggle to see this playing out in the real world. Am I correct in saying those who do not celebrate the LGBTQ+ lifestyle are not always welcomed or included?

All are welcome within the church. You can even pick which kind of sinner you'd like to sit next to, and people will gladly make room! No, you won't find sexual sins endorsed. Just like you won't find the pastor preaching on the goodness of being a greedy, lying, gossiping, gluttonous, busybody. But you will be welcomed into the body of believers, encouraged to take up your cross, and affirmed for who you truly are: an image-bearer of God.  

2 Peter 3:9; Romans 10:14; Hebrews 10:26; 1 Corinthians 5:1-6

Possible Response:*

• Tolerance is a virtue when listening to another's point of view. But I consider it a vice if you're talking about letting evil behavior overrun your society or prevent constructive dialogue over conflicting ideas or principles. 

So, tolerance is not always the answer.

1 Corinthians 5:1-6, 9-11; Galatians 5:19-21; Colossians 3:5-10

Do you have a question that goes deeper than what we have here? Get in touch with us by filling out the form below.

Questions and Answers were derived from

• *Frank Turek, Questions To Ask My LGBTQ Friends, I Don't Have Enough Faith to Be an Athiest Podcast, (Cross Examined), Feb 2020, https://crossexamined.org/questions-to-ask-my-lgbtq-friends/
• **Amy Davison, Prepping Your Kids for Pride Month, (Mama Bear Apologetics), https://mamabearapologetics.com/prepping-pride-month/
• ***Hilary Morgan Ferrer, The Genderbread Person pt.1, (Mama Bear Apologetics), https://mamabearapologetics.com/genderbread-person-part-1-gender-identity/